Today, I am finishing my article for The Christian Journal in Oregon. The topic is Restoration. Contemplating this topic makes me think of how God restores a hundred fold to those whom satan has taken from. What great love is that? Yet, how much of our time do we really give the Lord? When do we stop to hear His voice? Why is it we are often too busy to slow down for Him? What must we change today that will lead us closer to Him; closer to the One Who misses His time with us? What will it take? Will it take our losing those we love, things we have worked for, friendships we have cultivated or our own self dignity?
The definition of restoration is the act of restoring or state of being restored, as to a former or original condition, place, etc.; the replacement or giving back of something lost, stolen.
Have you experienced being stolen from, ripped off, been deceived or lied to? Then you know the importance of being restored. Health can be restored, relationships healed, items returned and our character brought to light in the presence of God. Restoration is as important as is justice and fairness. Restoration is the whole reason God sent His son, Jesus to die for us. We need restored back unto our God. Someone needed to bridge the gap and Jesus chose to take our place in a sin-filled world with consequences beyond our greatest imaginations awaiting us.
We are living in a world where spiritual acceleration is at every corner. Everywhere we turn is evidence that our time on earth is very limited. There is no more time to choose where we want God to have a place in our lives. Jesus is in the business of restoring lives back to Himself, between ourselves and amongst those who are lost and in need of Christ to save them from themselves. John 10:10 tells us that satan came to steal, kill and destroy, while Jesus came to give us life. Jesus is the restorer of our souls whereas satan harms our conditions, removes us from our positions, and steals our material goods and even our joy God blesses us with. What better way to respond than to thank God for being in the business of restoration and to extend grace and mercy when we have been slighted. Being confident God is turning things around for those who love Him and are called according to His purposes is part of being made whole and being restored.
So many of us welcome restoration with open arms; we seek after it like its substance is that of gold, yet how often do we sit in the presence of the One Whom we seek restoration from, and wait, listen and obey when He does speak to us? It's like seeking the gift but forgetting to recognize Whom the giver of that gift is. We can't have it all our way, heaven is not Burger King. We can't make the rules for they were ordained at the beginning of time by the One Who set the game of life in motion. We surely can't control every circumstance of our lives. Our Father in heaven knows what is best and loves us too much to leave us to our own destruction. Restoration and being made whole is achieved by means of a loving father, an unconditionally loving Son, Jesus Christ and by the power of the Holy Spirit. Being restored unto a loving relationship with God through Jesus Christ is at the core of every human's deepest need whether known or not.
Restoration is being restored back to an original position or place. It is being given back something that was stolen or lost. Although gaining our original position or being brought to our previous place is what restoration can be about, often it is the journey to restoration that puts less emphasis on what was stolen or lost and more importance on our relationship with our ultimate Restorers, almighty God and His Son Jesus Christ. Enter into restoration today and receive the wholeness God has for you.
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Easter!!! A Time to Remember - A Time to Reflect - A Time to Be So Thankful
What do we think of when we let the words of 'Easter' gently roll off our lips?
Decorating eggs? Family reunions? The Easter bunny? Perhaps it's just another over-commercialized holiday like so many others.
What should it be?
A day to remember. The day Jesus rose from death after 3 days of a journey like no other man has ever or will ever experience.
A time to reflect. Jesus chose to take upon Himself your sin, my sin, and our children's sin's of the past, the present and the future.
A time to be so thankful. Had Jesus Christ, (the Son of almighty God and Creator of everything) decided not to be punished and whipped for our sins, wearing a crown of thorns and carrying our burdens amongst His entire body, being nailed to the cross and scorned, ridiculed and beaten, what hope would there would have been no hope for you, me, our children or our future generations to receive eternal life.
So what does this mean to you?
I don't know, but it means the world to me.
Today, take a moment to remember...to reflect...the be so thankful for the blood Jesus shed for YOU, to know that God loves YOU so much He gave up His one and only Son Jesus for YOU so that if you believe on Jesus Christ died for YOUR sins, you can be saved and have eternal life.
If you realize you are a sinful being in need of a Savior, pray these words from your heart.
"Lord Jesus, I confess my sins to you and ask for Your forgiveness. I repent, turn away from desiring the things in my life not pleasing to You. I believe You sent Your Son Jesus to die for me. I accept Your forgiveness and free gift of salvation. Come into my life and make me new. Give me the strength to let go of past sins, the wisdom to walk in Your path now, hope for a better future and change my heart as I grow closer to You each day. Thank You for saving me. I am now Yours and surrender my life to Your will. Guide me in Your ways and truth, from this day forward.In Jesus name, Amen."
Congratulations! You've just made the most decision of your life!
Wait! It doesn't doesn't stop there!
To help you learn about your new life in Jesus you need to begin reading the Bible. If you don't already have one, email me at created2blessothers@yahoo.com and I will send you one, FREE of charge.
To help you grow as a new believer, begin attending a church that supports your belief in Jesus Christ ans Lord and Savior. If you need help finding a church family in your area, email me and I can help get you connected with those on the same journey as you.
To get prayer, receive words of wisdom from those going through similar events as you perhaps, and to deepen your relationship with others in the faith look into home groups that may be offered through your church.
Most of all, enjoy your new found journey of purpose, hope and peace!
Some of my favorite scriptures in the Bible - John 3:16, Philippians 4:13, John 1:9, Jeremiah 29:11-13, Philippians 4:4, Psalms 150:6, Romans 8:28.
Decorating eggs? Family reunions? The Easter bunny? Perhaps it's just another over-commercialized holiday like so many others.
What should it be?
A day to remember. The day Jesus rose from death after 3 days of a journey like no other man has ever or will ever experience.
A time to reflect. Jesus chose to take upon Himself your sin, my sin, and our children's sin's of the past, the present and the future.
A time to be so thankful. Had Jesus Christ, (the Son of almighty God and Creator of everything) decided not to be punished and whipped for our sins, wearing a crown of thorns and carrying our burdens amongst His entire body, being nailed to the cross and scorned, ridiculed and beaten, what hope would there would have been no hope for you, me, our children or our future generations to receive eternal life.
So what does this mean to you?
I don't know, but it means the world to me.
Today, take a moment to remember...to reflect...the be so thankful for the blood Jesus shed for YOU, to know that God loves YOU so much He gave up His one and only Son Jesus for YOU so that if you believe on Jesus Christ died for YOUR sins, you can be saved and have eternal life.
If you realize you are a sinful being in need of a Savior, pray these words from your heart.
"Lord Jesus, I confess my sins to you and ask for Your forgiveness. I repent, turn away from desiring the things in my life not pleasing to You. I believe You sent Your Son Jesus to die for me. I accept Your forgiveness and free gift of salvation. Come into my life and make me new. Give me the strength to let go of past sins, the wisdom to walk in Your path now, hope for a better future and change my heart as I grow closer to You each day. Thank You for saving me. I am now Yours and surrender my life to Your will. Guide me in Your ways and truth, from this day forward.In Jesus name, Amen."
Congratulations! You've just made the most decision of your life!
Wait! It doesn't doesn't stop there!
To help you learn about your new life in Jesus you need to begin reading the Bible. If you don't already have one, email me at created2blessothers@yahoo.com and I will send you one, FREE of charge.
To help you grow as a new believer, begin attending a church that supports your belief in Jesus Christ ans Lord and Savior. If you need help finding a church family in your area, email me and I can help get you connected with those on the same journey as you.
To get prayer, receive words of wisdom from those going through similar events as you perhaps, and to deepen your relationship with others in the faith look into home groups that may be offered through your church.
Most of all, enjoy your new found journey of purpose, hope and peace!
Some of my favorite scriptures in the Bible - John 3:16, Philippians 4:13, John 1:9, Jeremiah 29:11-13, Philippians 4:4, Psalms 150:6, Romans 8:28.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Psalm 16 - Trusting God Fully
Preserve me, oh God, for in You I put my trust. Oh my soul you have said to the Lord, "You are my Lord, my goodness is nothing apart from You." As for the saints who are on the earth, "They are the excellent ones, in whom is all my delight." Their sorrow shall be multiplied who hasten after another god; Their drink offerings of blood I will not offer, nor take up their names upon my lips.
O Lord, You are the portion of my inheritance and my cup; The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places; Yes, I have a good inheritance. I will bless the Lord Who has given me counsel; My heart also instructs me in the night season. I have set the Lord always before me; because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved.
Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices; my flesh also will rest in hope. For you will not leave my soul, nor will You allow Your Holy One to see corruption.
You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
O Lord, You are the portion of my inheritance and my cup; The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places; Yes, I have a good inheritance. I will bless the Lord Who has given me counsel; My heart also instructs me in the night season. I have set the Lord always before me; because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved.
Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices; my flesh also will rest in hope. For you will not leave my soul, nor will You allow Your Holy One to see corruption.
You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Noteworthy Revelations for 2010
Today, being the first day of 2010, I want to shed some light on the prophetic meaning of the number 10. I am sure you can all understand my divine interest in this topic since I'm an evangelical born again Christian and a Criminal Law student. So let me give you a few noteworthy things to ponder.
Specifically spoken by Dr. Stephen E. Jones in his book,The Biblical Meaning of Numbers from One to Forty,ten is the number of divine order which is being reestablished one way or another through the judgment of the law. In other words, it manifests the actual sentence of the law which follows the gathering and presentation of the evidence. After the Holy Spirit has revealed the evidence to expose men’s hearts (as in the meaning of the number nine), the Judge reveals the law. Meaning, he pronounces the sentence (as in the meaning of the number ten) according to the law.
Ten is the number that represents the time of judgment when humans either receive their reward or come under divine judgment. The number 10 is the symbol of "the works of the law" (Romans 20:12) meaning all will be judged according to their deeds. Something we all need to remember, is that 2008 meant new beginnings for believers and signifies searching with a inner room such as our hearts. Then in 2009 was the year of Jesus visiting the earth and searching for evidence of those whom were learning right from wrong much like a divine court case where the evidence is uncovered and presented to the judge for judgment. Now, in 2010, with judgment before us, how pertinent it is to allow God to search the most innermost part of our hearts and remaining open to God's revelation of any areas within that are any wicked ways within us, Psalm 139:23-24. It is important to live our lives in a way that evidence of rightful living before God will be found out by the Judge of all judges.
If the Holy Spirit has been nudging you about any area of your life, surrender that which is not pleasing to the Lord and invite Jesus to cleanse and renew those areas. Confess, repent, and accept the correction the Lord provides you with knowing that God chastens those He loves, Hebrews 12:6-7.
There is no greater honor than the King of Kings and Lord of Lords of all creation loving us enough to have sent His only Son to die for our sins, to pay the price for all the wicked things we have done, are doing or will ever do in our lives, John 3:16. What more can we give then our very lives back to the One Who created us.
2010 will be a year of judgment but those of us that are believers should allow God to search our hearts daily as we deal with those things within us that would be displeasing to the Lord. Decide now to give your heart and life to the Lord completely, without reservation. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart, Psalm 37:4. What better way to live fulfilled and satisfying lives in the year 2010?
Specifically spoken by Dr. Stephen E. Jones in his book,The Biblical Meaning of Numbers from One to Forty,ten is the number of divine order which is being reestablished one way or another through the judgment of the law. In other words, it manifests the actual sentence of the law which follows the gathering and presentation of the evidence. After the Holy Spirit has revealed the evidence to expose men’s hearts (as in the meaning of the number nine), the Judge reveals the law. Meaning, he pronounces the sentence (as in the meaning of the number ten) according to the law.
Ten is the number that represents the time of judgment when humans either receive their reward or come under divine judgment. The number 10 is the symbol of "the works of the law" (Romans 20:12) meaning all will be judged according to their deeds. Something we all need to remember, is that 2008 meant new beginnings for believers and signifies searching with a inner room such as our hearts. Then in 2009 was the year of Jesus visiting the earth and searching for evidence of those whom were learning right from wrong much like a divine court case where the evidence is uncovered and presented to the judge for judgment. Now, in 2010, with judgment before us, how pertinent it is to allow God to search the most innermost part of our hearts and remaining open to God's revelation of any areas within that are any wicked ways within us, Psalm 139:23-24. It is important to live our lives in a way that evidence of rightful living before God will be found out by the Judge of all judges.
If the Holy Spirit has been nudging you about any area of your life, surrender that which is not pleasing to the Lord and invite Jesus to cleanse and renew those areas. Confess, repent, and accept the correction the Lord provides you with knowing that God chastens those He loves, Hebrews 12:6-7.
There is no greater honor than the King of Kings and Lord of Lords of all creation loving us enough to have sent His only Son to die for our sins, to pay the price for all the wicked things we have done, are doing or will ever do in our lives, John 3:16. What more can we give then our very lives back to the One Who created us.
2010 will be a year of judgment but those of us that are believers should allow God to search our hearts daily as we deal with those things within us that would be displeasing to the Lord. Decide now to give your heart and life to the Lord completely, without reservation. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart, Psalm 37:4. What better way to live fulfilled and satisfying lives in the year 2010?
Thursday, November 26, 2009
A Day to be Thankful
I am thankful to God for loving me enough to send His Son Jesus to die for me and choosing me to be His daughter. I am thankful to Jesus Christ for taking all my sins, oh how many there are, upon Himself and paying the price for them so that I may have eternal life. I am thankful for my husband Kenny, what a blessing and gift to me. I am thankful for my children Doug, Chrissy, Tiffany and Branden; for they are blessed rewards I could never have even dreamed of receiving from the Lord. I am thankful for their spouses, Jessica, Jeffry and Kevin; for they complete our family perfectly. I am thankful for my precious grandchildren, Nathen and Tahlya; I am blessed beyond words because of these two wonderful gifts of life and love. I am thankful for extended family, my dad and stepmom, mom and dad in law, sweet sister-in-laws, awesome cousins, nieces and nephews and I am thankful for my friends because they enrich my life so very much. I am thankful for teachers who push me and believe in me. I am thankful for all my sweet pets as they are therapy to my soul. I am thankful for a home that keeps me warm, food to fill my tummy, a car that gets me from here to there, a good college education, health that I may bless others, a voice to praise God with and my very life and breath. And I am thankful for all of you, what would facebook be without you all!
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Not my own.........
Kenny called me and told me he had another job offer from the Christian owner of the tire shop we visited while there last March. Now going from $25 per hour to $15 I hourly is a significant reduction, but as I began to think about it, I heard God whispering to me that He was giving me the desires of my heart. I said, “What? How?” He brought to memory the past several years I have been asking Him to draw me closer to Him and to help me trust Him to a greater degree. Wow! This is it? Figures it has to involved finances, one of the hardest areas to totally surrender. I have not had trouble cheerfully giving 20% of my income when I made good money, but was I ready for us to live on almost half of what Ken made here in Oregon to grow closer to God, to trust him more fully? If not, whoa! I have a bigger issue on my hands than my distance from God or lack of trusting Him fully.
Am I trusting in money through Ken’s job or want to avoid stressing about money? That’s not trusting God for my finances. Do I want Ken to make more money so we can help our kids and others? That’s not trusting God to financially care for or provide for them. Would I rather have more money to give to God? I know God doesn’t need my money and can multiply any amount we give to increase the kingdom for Him.
Surrendering means giving up what I think I have a right to. In all actuality, when I gave my life to the Lord, did I mean for a time, only if certain requirements were met or just specific areas of my life? I don’t recall making a deal with him such as this but somehow when it comes to asking more from me than I had expected to give, conditions fill my head and fear seems to grasp my heart.
Have I not built enough monuments reminding me of God’s faithfulness, protection, goodness and sovereignty? Why would I think he would stop supplying our needs when that is basically what we are going out to Arizona with and not much else? Why is it hard for me to trust Him yet again, when I have peace about this decision of Kenny’s even though it was NOT my first choice? Could I be engineering my own peace over this massive pay deduction? Uh, I would think not.
So I have a choice . . . will I surrender or grasp tightly that which doesn’t belong to me in the first place? Hmmm, let me think, or rather pray about this. What is there really to think about? What is there really to pray about? Do I love God or not? Have I totally given Him my life or have I not? Do I trust Him or don’t I? I believe a surrender that brings me closer to sweet Jesus and causes me to trust in Him more is the only choice for me. Awww, a sweet surrender it is. Arizona, here we come!
Am I trusting in money through Ken’s job or want to avoid stressing about money? That’s not trusting God for my finances. Do I want Ken to make more money so we can help our kids and others? That’s not trusting God to financially care for or provide for them. Would I rather have more money to give to God? I know God doesn’t need my money and can multiply any amount we give to increase the kingdom for Him.
Surrendering means giving up what I think I have a right to. In all actuality, when I gave my life to the Lord, did I mean for a time, only if certain requirements were met or just specific areas of my life? I don’t recall making a deal with him such as this but somehow when it comes to asking more from me than I had expected to give, conditions fill my head and fear seems to grasp my heart.
Have I not built enough monuments reminding me of God’s faithfulness, protection, goodness and sovereignty? Why would I think he would stop supplying our needs when that is basically what we are going out to Arizona with and not much else? Why is it hard for me to trust Him yet again, when I have peace about this decision of Kenny’s even though it was NOT my first choice? Could I be engineering my own peace over this massive pay deduction? Uh, I would think not.
So I have a choice . . . will I surrender or grasp tightly that which doesn’t belong to me in the first place? Hmmm, let me think, or rather pray about this. What is there really to think about? What is there really to pray about? Do I love God or not? Have I totally given Him my life or have I not? Do I trust Him or don’t I? I believe a surrender that brings me closer to sweet Jesus and causes me to trust in Him more is the only choice for me. Awww, a sweet surrender it is. Arizona, here we come!
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
A Marriage Code - part II
Knowing the marriage code sure makes a world of difference. Bill and Pam Farrel tell us in their book, The Marriage Code, the username for wives is wife and the password is success which gives her access into a workable relationship with her husband. A woman's greatest desire is to connect with her husband emotionally, spiritually and financially. She wants her husband to experience the same emotional fullness she does. I have to agree with Bill and Pam. Come on ladies, think about it. Do we not want our hubbies to feel the same things we feel, understand how we understand and love us like we want to be loved. Let's be honest now. I know I am guilty of this. What happened to the giving part of the relationship? All of a sudden somehow, somewhere, as wives we begin to get caught up in the selfishness of being a spouse and the next thing you know, life is all about us. Not good....
Bill and Pam also say that the username for husband is husband and the password is security. Using these gives husband's access into workable relationships with their wives. His greatest desire is to help his wife succeed at what she wants to do in life. Meeting a wife's security need first in all things. This goes against a man's most basic instincts, but if a husband accomplishes this task, he draws his wife towards him and the relationship becomes relaxed. All simply because of the marriage code that can radically change a marriage.
Knowing issues within our marriage can make a world of difference once we know how to access the marriage codes that provide succession our husband's and security for us wives.
To purchase their book go to: http://www.farrelcommunications.com/
Bill and Pam also say that the username for husband is husband and the password is security. Using these gives husband's access into workable relationships with their wives. His greatest desire is to help his wife succeed at what she wants to do in life. Meeting a wife's security need first in all things. This goes against a man's most basic instincts, but if a husband accomplishes this task, he draws his wife towards him and the relationship becomes relaxed. All simply because of the marriage code that can radically change a marriage.
Knowing issues within our marriage can make a world of difference once we know how to access the marriage codes that provide succession our husband's and security for us wives.
To purchase their book go to: http://www.farrelcommunications.com/
Monday, November 2, 2009
A Marriage Code
My husband and I have been reading The Marriage Code by Bill and Pam Farrel and wanted to share a few things we thought might interest all who are married, and those who might be one day.
Discovering our own secret love languages has imperical value these days. We can find this language through understanding the secret code in marriages. Living in a world that uses codes has its advantages. We have usernames and passwords that get us into our email, facebook, twitter, eBay, blogspot, myspace, craigs list, amazon accounts, why would we not think there might be a code to delve inside the best parts of our relationships? Well there is. Taken right from Bill and Pam's book are a few tidbits to get you thinking.
* It is obvious when the code is in place because your relationship works well.
* It is just as obvious when the code is not in place because almost everything is out of sync.
* Entering the marriage code into your relationship is a daily exercise. In the same way that you need to enter a username and password into your computer each time you start it up, your love relationship needs an access code every day.
* The marriage code is based on the most common needs that men and women have.
Relationships are not as simplistic as you may have well found out by now. Men and women have different needs at the core of their very beings. These core needs shape how life is approached and how relationships are interacted within. Bill and Pam believe every person has these two core needs within them; the need for security and success. Security being the belief it is safe to be who we are. Success being the belief that our lives are workable.
Read more each day to find out what makes The Marriage Code such a life changing book every married couple should be reading!Whether you have figured out the marriage code in your own relationship or not, this book will give you keen insight to help other married couples. It can also be a valuable tool used in premarital counseling to give engaged couples an edge on their lifetime commitment of marriage.
Discovering our own secret love languages has imperical value these days. We can find this language through understanding the secret code in marriages. Living in a world that uses codes has its advantages. We have usernames and passwords that get us into our email, facebook, twitter, eBay, blogspot, myspace, craigs list, amazon accounts, why would we not think there might be a code to delve inside the best parts of our relationships? Well there is. Taken right from Bill and Pam's book are a few tidbits to get you thinking.
* It is obvious when the code is in place because your relationship works well.
* It is just as obvious when the code is not in place because almost everything is out of sync.
* Entering the marriage code into your relationship is a daily exercise. In the same way that you need to enter a username and password into your computer each time you start it up, your love relationship needs an access code every day.
* The marriage code is based on the most common needs that men and women have.
Relationships are not as simplistic as you may have well found out by now. Men and women have different needs at the core of their very beings. These core needs shape how life is approached and how relationships are interacted within. Bill and Pam believe every person has these two core needs within them; the need for security and success. Security being the belief it is safe to be who we are. Success being the belief that our lives are workable.
Read more each day to find out what makes The Marriage Code such a life changing book every married couple should be reading!Whether you have figured out the marriage code in your own relationship or not, this book will give you keen insight to help other married couples. It can also be a valuable tool used in premarital counseling to give engaged couples an edge on their lifetime commitment of marriage.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
7 Steps to a Healthy Marriage
COMMITTMENT
Commitment is the foremost important decision to make before you are wed, beginning with, "from this day forward.." Statistics show, those with a mind set of believing they are marrying ‘until do us part' have a 50% greater chance of weathering storms that come their way during their marriages. With over half of all marriages ending in divorce within the first three years, that doubles your chances of marriage survival. Going into marriage knowing you are basically stuck for life with the one you have chosen, will make a drastic impact on decisions you make together with your spouse, how you handle conflict, how many children you both want if any, where you want to spend your lives together, career choices and much more.
Be committed from day one, make the choice to stick it out no matter what. With this in mind, all decision will be made together, all conflicts will be resolved, you will agree on how many children you want, where you want to live together and what careers you both want to purse with eachother's blessing and support.
AGREEMENT
Being in agreement with one another is very important as well. Without this vital key in a marriage, boiling arguments are inevitable. Decisions will be made without the other knowing, and often will conflict with one another causing strife and undue anxiety. Stress will rot your bones as is mentioned in the Bible, therefore why not prevent excessive stress from getting the best of you by setting some guidelines right form the beginning.
Areas of most importance to agree on are spending limits when you are together or apart, what is expected of one another in the home, who the main supporter will be and how much supplemental income may be needed by the other spouse, major purchases, who is responsible for balancing checkbooks and sending payments, if education will play a role in either spouse's life after the wedding, how many children and when to begin having them, discipline of the children, life and death decisions involving insurance, retirement funds and inheritance issues,friendships after marriage, television and music influences in the home, etc. These are all issues that will arise after the wedding and if an agreement has not been made, there is not unity and balance which will surely lead to dysfunction, quarreling and misjudgments. Having agreement brings about stability in the couple, happiness and peace. Things that make a marriage strong and last a lifetime.
COMMON INTERESTS
What normally brings two people together are common interests. Where you met, what you were doing and who you were with all have a bearing on whether you want to get to know someone better or not. If the ‘click' is not there, chances are you cannot create it later on. Laws of attraction kick in immediately and whatever you were doing when you met your spouse, however serious or fun it may have been, will likely be the glue that holds you together through
thick and thin.
As people grow older changes occur. Not just physically but emotionally and socially. It is important to know what your spouse likes to do and not do. While you both may not like everything the same, enjoying several things together will bring harmony, closeness and a sense of togetherness into your marriage. While there must be things you both like to do or places you both like to go, when one spouse wants to do something the other does not, often it is a sacrifice of love for the spouse who would rather be fishing than scrapbooking or visa versa. Couples still need time alone as well, to enjoy activities apart from their spouses. The blending of two lives in to one, does not mean the individual spouse loses themself altogether in their mate. It just means a new life for the both of them takes place and they are joined as one with their own personalities, likes, dislikes and lifestyles blending to complete eachother more fully. Taking the time to share in your spouse's joys and sorrows, fun and sometimes boring events of life grows a relationship deeper and closer than ever before. It solidifies the marriage and a sense of oneness just happens naturally. This oneness cannot easily be broken and therefore brings security and stability to a
marriage.
FORGIVING FOREVER
This is probably one of the hardest things to do in one's life let alone in a marriage. Trust is a very important factor in a marriage and once it is broke, it is hard to earn it back, but it is not impossible with forgiveness.
Whether you've been wronged on purpose or an accident, offenses hurt, and sometimes they hurt deeply. Time does heal, but often, time is not enough. Forgiveness does not say the offense was okay, it only wipes it away, puts it in the past and keeps it there. This is what makes forgiveness such a necessary component in a marriage. In the time you are wed, there will be wrongs experienced, offenses dealt and unfortunate misunderstandings happen that lead to feelings being hurt and trust being tested. Without forgiveness, offenses can be held in the heart, dangled over heads, and used as a weapon against the other spouse and further offenses can take place. Forgiveness paves the way for healing and restoration. Two things every marriage must have actively working in it or it is just a matter of time for the marriage to dissolve and each go his/her own way. Forgiveness is tough, usually needing a supernatural touch from God to ensure forgiveness is forever. It must be reciprocated, all the time. Both spouses must be willing to seek forgiveness before closing the issues and moving on. Just as love can last a lifetime, forgiveness needs to be forever. No looking back, bringing up old offenses, or holding grudges. Trust can be rebuilt when forgiveness is genuinely offered and accepted. The marriage can become stronger and spouses can feel closer than ever, when forgiveness is present in the relationship.
GIVE AND TAKE
When we marry, we are deeply in love, wishing only the best for our spouses, and expecting only the best from them. When we dated our spouses, we always put them first, giving 110% of ourselves, our time and attention. Their needs, wants and desires became ours. We thought alike, laughed over the same things, and enjoyed believing in one another. Every day was new and fresh with excitement of what it may hold. Selfishness was not in either spouses vocabulary, for each spouse did everything they could to please the other. After the wedding, it is easy to get comfortable and think about our relationship as being planted firmly and unshakable. All too soon, the other spouse is no longer top priority. Other things come into play, such as a new job, hobby or interest. One spouse slacks off with their own responsibilities leaving the other carrying more than half the weight in the relationship. If this is you, a check and balance system needs to be adopted and both spouses need to comply.
Sure there will be times when one spouse may only be able to give say 60%. This is where the other spouse will need to give 140% and actually make up for the lack of the other spouse. Maybe one spouse is having to change jobs and more hours at work are involved. The spouse with the same routine may need to pick up some of the slack of the other spouse for a time. Agreeing on how long and knowing what extra duties must rest on the spouse without the new demands is extremely important. This occasional overlap allows needs to still be met, responsibilities to be taken care of while peace and joy can remain between the couple. If either spouse kicks back for too long, burdens are felt by both spouses, patience falls and if the weight of one spouse is carried for too long, the one will crumble and animosity and grudges can form and be very hard to work through. Marriages are give and take relationships. Keeping things in balance long enough for couples to return to routines and deposit into their reserves once again. This deposit is what helps whether storms that would ordinarily shake a marriage to pieces. Giving 110% never sees gaps, it is always covering for bumps and being sure there is always enough to sustain the marriage.
POWER OF APOLOGY
The simple word is quite powerful actually. Saying your sorry covers a multitude of sins and can lead to immediate healing and restoration. What could take years to overcome, can happen in a matter of a few words, I'm truly sorry. These are words to live by, to love by and to die by.
When an apology is left unsaid, bitterness can easily grow in the heart leaving little room for love and kindness. Simply say your sorry. The event may not have been your fault, or it may have been. Either way, whatever touches our spouse touches us as well. If we are to maintain a healthy relationship with those we love, particularly our spouses, sorry should not only roll naturally out of our mouths, but immediately. In a marriage, a spouse normally does not want to hurt their beloved partner, but to help heal and restore them. Apologizing right away leaves little room for hurt to bury itself within the walls of the heart. Saying sorry cuts through the pain and opens wounds to heal while helping to avoid any festering. A soft answer does turn away wrath, and if troubled by anger, you are approached with a gentle, caring apology, it make sit very hard to remain hard and cold. Saying you're sorry, begins the necessary healing and forgiveness process, that makes good relationships better and great relationships outstanding.
BEING THANKFUL
Last, but not least, is thankfulness. Gratitude goes far and is remembered long after it is offered. There are so many things in life to be thankful for, and our spouse should be at the top of the list. When we are thankful, it gives us a sense of appreciation we can get from nothing else in life. Through good times and in bad times, thankfulness for having met our spouse, marrying and committing our lives to them deepens our walk with them. The world is viewed as a better place just because of thankfulness.
Think of the times you were thankful and those you were not. Were not the times of thankfulness far more fulfilling than those times we sulked in our self-pity? So why not choose to be thankful rather than ungrateful? Being thankful humbles and reminds us to look around and be content with such things that we have. Putting thankfulness at the top of our list not only makes us feel good, but it also makes your spouse feel that you are putting them first.. Which in return makes them want to put you above them. It is a wonderful, endless cycle to get caught up in. It seems when we are not thankful, everything in life looks bitter. Skies are darker, flowers lose their sweet scents, people irritate us more and life just seems depressing. Being thankful truly is a wonderful way of life, of looking at things and experiencing life's greatest rewards, no matter how small or how large. Being thankful is always worth it.
Commitment is the foremost important decision to make before you are wed, beginning with, "from this day forward.." Statistics show, those with a mind set of believing they are marrying ‘until do us part' have a 50% greater chance of weathering storms that come their way during their marriages. With over half of all marriages ending in divorce within the first three years, that doubles your chances of marriage survival. Going into marriage knowing you are basically stuck for life with the one you have chosen, will make a drastic impact on decisions you make together with your spouse, how you handle conflict, how many children you both want if any, where you want to spend your lives together, career choices and much more.
Be committed from day one, make the choice to stick it out no matter what. With this in mind, all decision will be made together, all conflicts will be resolved, you will agree on how many children you want, where you want to live together and what careers you both want to purse with eachother's blessing and support.
AGREEMENT
Being in agreement with one another is very important as well. Without this vital key in a marriage, boiling arguments are inevitable. Decisions will be made without the other knowing, and often will conflict with one another causing strife and undue anxiety. Stress will rot your bones as is mentioned in the Bible, therefore why not prevent excessive stress from getting the best of you by setting some guidelines right form the beginning.
Areas of most importance to agree on are spending limits when you are together or apart, what is expected of one another in the home, who the main supporter will be and how much supplemental income may be needed by the other spouse, major purchases, who is responsible for balancing checkbooks and sending payments, if education will play a role in either spouse's life after the wedding, how many children and when to begin having them, discipline of the children, life and death decisions involving insurance, retirement funds and inheritance issues,friendships after marriage, television and music influences in the home, etc. These are all issues that will arise after the wedding and if an agreement has not been made, there is not unity and balance which will surely lead to dysfunction, quarreling and misjudgments. Having agreement brings about stability in the couple, happiness and peace. Things that make a marriage strong and last a lifetime.
COMMON INTERESTS
What normally brings two people together are common interests. Where you met, what you were doing and who you were with all have a bearing on whether you want to get to know someone better or not. If the ‘click' is not there, chances are you cannot create it later on. Laws of attraction kick in immediately and whatever you were doing when you met your spouse, however serious or fun it may have been, will likely be the glue that holds you together through
thick and thin.
As people grow older changes occur. Not just physically but emotionally and socially. It is important to know what your spouse likes to do and not do. While you both may not like everything the same, enjoying several things together will bring harmony, closeness and a sense of togetherness into your marriage. While there must be things you both like to do or places you both like to go, when one spouse wants to do something the other does not, often it is a sacrifice of love for the spouse who would rather be fishing than scrapbooking or visa versa. Couples still need time alone as well, to enjoy activities apart from their spouses. The blending of two lives in to one, does not mean the individual spouse loses themself altogether in their mate. It just means a new life for the both of them takes place and they are joined as one with their own personalities, likes, dislikes and lifestyles blending to complete eachother more fully. Taking the time to share in your spouse's joys and sorrows, fun and sometimes boring events of life grows a relationship deeper and closer than ever before. It solidifies the marriage and a sense of oneness just happens naturally. This oneness cannot easily be broken and therefore brings security and stability to a
marriage.
FORGIVING FOREVER
This is probably one of the hardest things to do in one's life let alone in a marriage. Trust is a very important factor in a marriage and once it is broke, it is hard to earn it back, but it is not impossible with forgiveness.
Whether you've been wronged on purpose or an accident, offenses hurt, and sometimes they hurt deeply. Time does heal, but often, time is not enough. Forgiveness does not say the offense was okay, it only wipes it away, puts it in the past and keeps it there. This is what makes forgiveness such a necessary component in a marriage. In the time you are wed, there will be wrongs experienced, offenses dealt and unfortunate misunderstandings happen that lead to feelings being hurt and trust being tested. Without forgiveness, offenses can be held in the heart, dangled over heads, and used as a weapon against the other spouse and further offenses can take place. Forgiveness paves the way for healing and restoration. Two things every marriage must have actively working in it or it is just a matter of time for the marriage to dissolve and each go his/her own way. Forgiveness is tough, usually needing a supernatural touch from God to ensure forgiveness is forever. It must be reciprocated, all the time. Both spouses must be willing to seek forgiveness before closing the issues and moving on. Just as love can last a lifetime, forgiveness needs to be forever. No looking back, bringing up old offenses, or holding grudges. Trust can be rebuilt when forgiveness is genuinely offered and accepted. The marriage can become stronger and spouses can feel closer than ever, when forgiveness is present in the relationship.
GIVE AND TAKE
When we marry, we are deeply in love, wishing only the best for our spouses, and expecting only the best from them. When we dated our spouses, we always put them first, giving 110% of ourselves, our time and attention. Their needs, wants and desires became ours. We thought alike, laughed over the same things, and enjoyed believing in one another. Every day was new and fresh with excitement of what it may hold. Selfishness was not in either spouses vocabulary, for each spouse did everything they could to please the other. After the wedding, it is easy to get comfortable and think about our relationship as being planted firmly and unshakable. All too soon, the other spouse is no longer top priority. Other things come into play, such as a new job, hobby or interest. One spouse slacks off with their own responsibilities leaving the other carrying more than half the weight in the relationship. If this is you, a check and balance system needs to be adopted and both spouses need to comply.
Sure there will be times when one spouse may only be able to give say 60%. This is where the other spouse will need to give 140% and actually make up for the lack of the other spouse. Maybe one spouse is having to change jobs and more hours at work are involved. The spouse with the same routine may need to pick up some of the slack of the other spouse for a time. Agreeing on how long and knowing what extra duties must rest on the spouse without the new demands is extremely important. This occasional overlap allows needs to still be met, responsibilities to be taken care of while peace and joy can remain between the couple. If either spouse kicks back for too long, burdens are felt by both spouses, patience falls and if the weight of one spouse is carried for too long, the one will crumble and animosity and grudges can form and be very hard to work through. Marriages are give and take relationships. Keeping things in balance long enough for couples to return to routines and deposit into their reserves once again. This deposit is what helps whether storms that would ordinarily shake a marriage to pieces. Giving 110% never sees gaps, it is always covering for bumps and being sure there is always enough to sustain the marriage.
POWER OF APOLOGY
The simple word is quite powerful actually. Saying your sorry covers a multitude of sins and can lead to immediate healing and restoration. What could take years to overcome, can happen in a matter of a few words, I'm truly sorry. These are words to live by, to love by and to die by.
When an apology is left unsaid, bitterness can easily grow in the heart leaving little room for love and kindness. Simply say your sorry. The event may not have been your fault, or it may have been. Either way, whatever touches our spouse touches us as well. If we are to maintain a healthy relationship with those we love, particularly our spouses, sorry should not only roll naturally out of our mouths, but immediately. In a marriage, a spouse normally does not want to hurt their beloved partner, but to help heal and restore them. Apologizing right away leaves little room for hurt to bury itself within the walls of the heart. Saying sorry cuts through the pain and opens wounds to heal while helping to avoid any festering. A soft answer does turn away wrath, and if troubled by anger, you are approached with a gentle, caring apology, it make sit very hard to remain hard and cold. Saying you're sorry, begins the necessary healing and forgiveness process, that makes good relationships better and great relationships outstanding.
BEING THANKFUL
Last, but not least, is thankfulness. Gratitude goes far and is remembered long after it is offered. There are so many things in life to be thankful for, and our spouse should be at the top of the list. When we are thankful, it gives us a sense of appreciation we can get from nothing else in life. Through good times and in bad times, thankfulness for having met our spouse, marrying and committing our lives to them deepens our walk with them. The world is viewed as a better place just because of thankfulness.
Think of the times you were thankful and those you were not. Were not the times of thankfulness far more fulfilling than those times we sulked in our self-pity? So why not choose to be thankful rather than ungrateful? Being thankful humbles and reminds us to look around and be content with such things that we have. Putting thankfulness at the top of our list not only makes us feel good, but it also makes your spouse feel that you are putting them first.. Which in return makes them want to put you above them. It is a wonderful, endless cycle to get caught up in. It seems when we are not thankful, everything in life looks bitter. Skies are darker, flowers lose their sweet scents, people irritate us more and life just seems depressing. Being thankful truly is a wonderful way of life, of looking at things and experiencing life's greatest rewards, no matter how small or how large. Being thankful is always worth it.
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