Saturday, July 10, 2010

A Day of Loss....a Day of Victory

Today, my home in Grants Pass, Oregon was auctioned. How sorrowful I was upon waking this morning, so I stayed in bed until the auction was probably over. I had tried to make this house a home since 2001 and in February 2010, I and my family left our home in Oregon to move to Phoenix, AZ and begin a new life.

So many losing homes, so much sorrow and feeling of loneliness. But I had to stop and remember my real home is in heaven. This home of almost ten years, was only made of wood and nails. This home will one day perish anyway, but my home in heaven will not. It is there, waiting for me, waiting for me to reside in it when the Lord sees it is time for me to do so.

So why the sadness, lonely feeling and despair I asked myself. I believe it is because I lost my focus somewhere in building my home. God was the One Who gave me this home in the first place, He had every right to allow it to be taken away from me as well. So what does it really boil down to? Surrender.... that's what. Have I really surrendered not only my life, but my possessions God bestows upon me with however long I am possessor of them? Hmmmmm, I pondered this thought and came to the conclusion, no, I have not. I say I have, feel I have but deep down, I can see I have not.

I have been asking the Lord to show me everything He wants me to learn and gain out of losing my home. A sweet surrender is what He wants from me, and I have yet to totally and give myself and desires, dreams and wishes over to Him, completely, that's the key. There is so much I still hold onto and do not even realize it. So I pray, "Lord, please reveal to me any ways that are not pleasing to You. Show me the areas of my life, my heart and my mind I have not truly given to You. Love me enough to not allow me to continue owning those things that truly are not mine, or were not meant to be mine forever. Give me wisdom to see the difference between earthly living and Godly living in every single area of my entire being. May there be so much less of me and more of you. Let me rely on You completely and when You remove things from my life, take things back or say no to things I want to hear You say yes to, remind me Who is on the throne and who is sitting at Your feet. In Jesus name, Amen."

As I take a deep breath and sense God's presence in my midst, I can feel myself loosen my grip on certain things that hang me up. I smile and shake my head at myself for taking so long to see the truth and I sincerely thank God for loving me enough to not let me stay this way, to stay in darkness, in sin, not trusting Him and trusting in things.

I challenge you to let God dig deep into the very crevices of your heart and soul. Allow Him to show you areas you too may have entitlement to, so you can experience God's victory over bondage and sweet freedom from ownership of things in this dying and decaying world. May you be blessed be the One Who above all else, matters and loves you despite your weaknesses, failures and even disobedience. May God be you're all in all.

7 comments: